What TRUE Size Acceptance Really Is.

A few days before Thanksgiving this year, a picture started making the round all over Tumblr, Facebook, and some of the fat oriented forums.


It’s a cool pic, with a young lady with a nice smile, and even with the spelling error (it’s THEN, not THAN), it conveyed a positive message for fat people, right?

Not necessarily.

See, there’s a group of people (many of them men) who still somehow want to exercise some sort of judgment, as if their validation of this girl is the end all of opinion.  Some comments under this picture included (by some people who purport to be attracted to fat women):

Hmm..size matters not. It’s how you carry yourself. You can be a sloppy size 2 and a well kept beautiful size 22. The opposite is true as well.

Girl in photo not even that cute in the face

Are you kidding?  You’re cute, but not GLORIOUS!!

I reflected on all of the comments, and wondered what this girl would be thinking if she had read all of the comments that were made that essentially “rated” her, rather than these same people debating whether her sign had true ideological merit.  Many people come to this community for acceptance, and it doesn’t take long to find out the harsh reality is that the fat community is equally judgmental when it comes to both beauty and sexuality (with the emphasis on sexuality).  Some are smart enough to leave and develop their own sense of self worth that isn’t solely based on beauty/sexuality, but based on the quality of the person.  Others remain, and continue to bang their heads against the wall, posting pics like this, wondering why people who should be more sensitive can be so cruel.

Just as important however, is the message on the sign itself.

If a size “2” is beautiful, than(then) my size “22” must be glorious!

It’s a not so silent insinuation that a size 22 is better than a size 2.  With that said, would a size 32 be more glorious than the 22?  Would an 800 pound woman rule the fat world?

There’s a guy website that exists to glorify “THICK” women.  Early on in my journey, I participated in this forum, until I realized all the covert body shaming that went on…….”no one over 300 lbs, please!” was the cry.  I didn’t last long in that forum.

See, true size acceptance sees the beauty in all sizes.  There’s NO distinction that one size is better, or worse than another person of a different size.  That is the difference between size acceptance and fat acceptance.  Size acceptance is all inclusive, whereas fat acceptance works solely towards changing the world’s mindset about fat people.

While some will disagree with me, fat acceptance can’t take place universally until we can find beauty in all people regardless of size.  Without that, you’ll just have a bunch of fat people fighting to prove they’re beautiful, skinny people looking for same, and anyone else in between looking at both sides as some sort of aberration.

Hopefully, that’s not what you readers want, and will go out and continue to educate the world about the difference.  It has to be done from within, though, so when you see someone putting down another due to size, please speak out, and point out how there is no such thing as too thin, too fat, too average when it comes to body type, and it’s who we are inside that makes us great, or not so great.


4 thoughts on “What TRUE Size Acceptance Really Is.

  1. I have been victim and villain of both angles. I am still learning to love my own body, but not demean “skinny girls” in the process. I am tired of trying to fight and prove that I have a right to be here too. It’s not so much the “fat” acceptance, but “People” acceptance. We shouldn’t have to fight tooth and nail to prove we belong here; that’s for anyone.

  2. I disagree, but more on the principle of you mentioning beauty instead of “Acceptance.” I mean, people shouldn’t waste time on the internet or elsewhere clamoring about whether or not someone is beautiful to them. If you aren’t attracted to someone: So be it. They are not meant for you, but that does not in any way mean they are unworthy of love and acceptance. There’s no reason to waste time and be insulting. To me, Size Acceptance is about accepting everyone regardless of what’s on the scale, and having principles that align with teaching positive body image. Not just because it’s the moral thing to do, but because it contributes to good health. For everyone.

    I think the beauty component of it is valid and a great thing, but is I don’t think it’s the core of what it means. People are discriminated against, paid less, and are stereotyped because of their size. That is surely an important fight, as well as the one-dimensional beauty myth that plagues our society.

    1. I agree, Jon. Your point is taken, but please understand who my blog is written to.
      You are further along the journey of understanding what size acceptance is all about. Not everyone has moved along as far as you have, and the blog is written to those who aren’t yet ready to understand size acceptance beyond what is sexually attractive and not, to them.
      While I’d love to make this a doctoral thesis, the fact remains that for a lot of people, this is a new phenomenon, and I am addressing them, not people who are veterans of the movement. That will come in SIze Acceptance 2.0, I promise.

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