So, though I remain somewhat of an island and distance myself from the fat community, I continue to remain active in defending size/fat acceptance, especially in the one area where people often fear to tread.
The dreaded INTERNET.
Yes, THAT internet, where the keyboard commandos sit “safely” and spew their venom, thinking that THEIR thinking is the only way to think, and are rarely challenged. That’s where I come in.
See, I am not afraid to take them on, not just here on the net, but in real life. Some within the community feel it’s somewhat disingenuous on my part to do it, others simply feel it’s not necessary. Some women think it’s all about white knighting, which it isn’t, since some of my forum interactions and blog comments have centered around fat men as well. (insert gay joke about Phil here).
Someone in a forum recently said this about net posting:
Good rule of thumb to steer clear of comments section of any major news outlet. The bellowing vox populi of the unwashed masses contribute nothing to adult discussion.”
I disagreed, and here’s my rationale. The more people hear that fat is no different than any other physical characteristic or trait, the better the chance that it might sink in some day. It’s an uphill battle, especially with the fools who throw hatred around like there’s a competition, but I’ve always been up for the challenge. Long before the internet took up so much of my time, I used to do the same thing when someone would make a snarky comment about my fat friends, or fat people I may have been romantically involved with. It’s not a question of defending the other person’s honor. For me, it’s simply about correcting bad behavior. Granted, some don’t get it, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try.
Sure, there’s conflict, but conflict avoidance has never changed the world. Remember, for every Dr. Martin Luther King who advocated demonstrating peacefully, there was a Huey Newton or Malcolm X, who would get right in the haters faces. While some view this as being counter productive, I’m not sure that civil rights would have furthered to where it is today without both ways of handling it.
This brings me to a recent blog that I read, written on a site that does nothing BUT hate. Here’s the first paragraph from the blog:
Fat chicks have created a self sustaining monopoly. Merely by existing, they lower the number of attractive females that exist in total. This, by way of supply and demand, makes the already existing thin/hot chicks MORE attractive and more desired. Now, most guys want to put their dick in something, and because most overweight guys weren’t ever the types to be lining up to slay pussy in the first place (I say this as a former dork and fat guy), that means that the same pool of sexually active men are now competing for a smaller pool of attractive females.”
Oh I see, you want to thin the herd………….
See, I have this theory that often people who don’t have opinions end up on sites like this, and if left unchallenged, think these thoughts might just be the right way to think. I’m sorry, I just can’t allow that to happen, so while I do my best not to stoop so low to get on their gutteral level, I still get my shots in to the idiots, and make my points so those on the fence can make a decision based on hearing/reading more than one side.
SO, here was my response to the blog writer, who has at least had the courage to leave my comments on his blog (or hasn’t returned to read it):
I’m a middle aged guy, in pretty good shape, with a good job who happens to find fat girls attractive. My first reaction to this blog is to say, “great, more hot fat chicks for me!”, but after some reflection, I realized that while I may be attracted to women with soft curves, I’ve never written blogs about how I dislike thin or “average” women.
I then realized that what’s being said here is a form of discrimination, and I’ve never discriminated.
I “get it”, it’s your right to think up shit like this, and have an avenue to publish it on the internet. It’s my right however, to rebut it, and point out that only simple minds the result of cousins marrying cousins could actually think up this kinda stuff.
That, and “more hot fat chicks for me!”
Honestly, I don’t care if people like my responses or not, either side. There have been many times over the years when I was called out by the community that I work so hard to defend and support for having ulterior motives. Well, I’ve been online over 15 years, and I really think my ulterior motives would have surfaced by now. So get off your own high horses, stop judging, and take the time to do something positive for size acceptance, even if it’s refuting assholes one post at a time.