I was recently invited by a friend to join a new forum that encouraged the intelligent discussion of fat sexuality, and fat related issues without the back biting and snarkiness that goes on in so many of the other BBW/FA forums on the net. I have much respect for the person who started the forum, and thought it might be worth ending my hiatus from posting anywhere.
I looked at most of the posts in the various areas of the forum, and it seemed to be as she described it.
That is, until I began to post.
See, there’s a woman who posts in this forum who also used to post in Dementians. Without getting into specific details, she’s really good friends with an ex of mine. That relationship didn’t end well, and for quite some time, the ex and her henchman have been taking swipes at me, calling me names on their Facebook pages (you didn’t think I’d see that you called me the “Drama Llama”, and how you were going to kill, skin and roast me?).
So, I posted in a thread that asked about FA’s and how they relate to Size Acceptance. I like fat women, so I think I qualify. I also run/ran the New Jersey Bash, and feel I’m pretty qualified to offer insight into how the FA’s view size acceptance at the macro level. I tied my thoughts into personal experience, and while most of the responses, including those who disagreed with me were on topic, the response from this henchman was posted to bait me into a personal argument that would have had nothing to do with the topic being discussed. It hinted that my insights based on real life experience were illogical and unproductive.
That was my last post in the forum.
I wrote the webmaster this evening, and thanked her for inviting me, but I informed her of what I wrote in this blog, and that I’d rather just keep in my own little world here on my blog, where my thoughts can stand on their own, not tainted by another person’s like or dislike of me. Whenever I posted in those forums, I kept an open mind, and never let my personal feelings about a person cloud whether any of the things they posted might have merit. I mean after all, even a blind squirrel finds a nut every now and then.
So, rather than engaging this person with an agenda, I bowed out of the thread, and the forum. See, I’ve always held that it’s not worth the drama. If someone tries to get you to do the drama dance with them, and you choose NOT TO, they end up dancing alone, and look foolish as hell.
And honey, that just makes YOU the drama llama, not me…………..
Funny thing………about a week ago, I friended someone on Facebook who I often disagreed with, yet respected her points of view, as they always were from a point of knowledge, and our disagreements never contained personal attacks, but always focused on issues. Perhaps my little buddy from NY could learn a thing or two from her.